Now what?

So we are home,so... now what?

I had to meet with Brenner and Darius's case worker. Things are mostly wrapped up as far as child protective services is concerned. Nathan is still in jail and the investigation by the police is so much as over. There is no concern with me caring for the boys- they are not in the custody of the state, etc. But they have to cross all their T's and dot all their I's. So we are waiting to hear on that. And there is most likely going to be a long legal process with Nathan. And I am not looking forward to going through all of that. We live in a town of only approximately 20,000 people... and all that that implies. I go back to work Wednesday. Grandma will be watching the boys when I am there.

Brenner has follow-up appointments back in Aurora with orthopedics, neurology, neurosurgery and opthomology in a month. We have a follow-up swallow study in 3 months. We follow-up with rehab in 6 months. Early intervention services will be contacting us soon to set up monthly services to make sure Brenner is getting help with physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy and vision training as needed. Everything right now is "wait and see". The neurosurgeons told me that the brain is not done developing until you are 25 years old, so the full effects of this will not be known until Brenner is a young adult.

I feel like I am in the eye of a storm clinging to my kids, watching everything swirling and flying around us- everything in our lives up in the air. The thought of the future more than days or even hours ahead petrifies me so I continue on an hour at a time, just doing what is necessary to make it to the next hour to figure out where we go from there.

Brenner (and Darius and I) have been blessed beyond measure by the faith and prayers of family, friends and strangers alike. We feel the love and positive energy of literally thousands of people, coming together in support of our tiny family. Our thanks can never be enough, but you have it, all of you. A good thought, a prayer, a monetary contribution, spreading awareness about non-accidental trauma (shaken baby syndrome) in infants, a card, a positive word- ALL mean the world to us right now and we appreciate you all!